one explanation for a broken toilet
cast of characters:
jess (played by me)
janitor guy/software developer (nameless to protect his identity) a.k.a JGSD
POS toilet
first off, i did not CLOG the toilet, i merely BROKE it. COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!! i was NOT under any kind of colonic or gastric distress. why am i so defensive??
so, i am in the bathroom, right? of course i was! where ELSE do you find toilets?? anyway, i stand up, i zip, i flush the toilet like 290 million other americans do approximately 7 times a day. but this was no ordinary flush. the handle broke off in my hand. snapped like a twig. so i am like...aw... $@#!
i slink back to my cube. yeah, i have a cubicle. yay me. that will be another post.
this next part took place on IM:
jess: uh, hi JGSD. i, uh, broke one of the toilets. you might want to fix that soon. just the handle broke off.
JGSD: oh hi jess. no problem. i picked up a couple of handles yesterday.
jess: wow. you must be psychic.
JGSD: nah... you aren't the first one to break one. i need to have some on hand.
jess: sweet. glad to hear you are prepared.
JGSD: i'll get it fixed right away. do i uh, need to wait a few minutes? j/k lol
jess: uh, negative ghost rider. all clear.
why is bathroom humor so funny? probably because no matter who you are, no matter where you live, what kind of car you drive, how much money you make, you HAVE to go potty. JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE! kinda erases all the social, economic, racial, whatever kind of lines there are. poop and pee can do that like nothing else can, i guess.
glad i got that all cleared up. thanks A LOT bridge. i had set this personal goal to not use "poop" or "pee" in my next 17 posts. and i didn't even make it through ONE.
jess (played by me)
janitor guy/software developer (nameless to protect his identity) a.k.a JGSD
POS toilet
first off, i did not CLOG the toilet, i merely BROKE it. COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!! i was NOT under any kind of colonic or gastric distress. why am i so defensive??
so, i am in the bathroom, right? of course i was! where ELSE do you find toilets?? anyway, i stand up, i zip, i flush the toilet like 290 million other americans do approximately 7 times a day. but this was no ordinary flush. the handle broke off in my hand. snapped like a twig. so i am like...aw... $@#!
i slink back to my cube. yeah, i have a cubicle. yay me. that will be another post.
this next part took place on IM:
jess: uh, hi JGSD. i, uh, broke one of the toilets. you might want to fix that soon. just the handle broke off.
JGSD: oh hi jess. no problem. i picked up a couple of handles yesterday.
jess: wow. you must be psychic.
JGSD: nah... you aren't the first one to break one. i need to have some on hand.
jess: sweet. glad to hear you are prepared.
JGSD: i'll get it fixed right away. do i uh, need to wait a few minutes? j/k lol
jess: uh, negative ghost rider. all clear.
why is bathroom humor so funny? probably because no matter who you are, no matter where you live, what kind of car you drive, how much money you make, you HAVE to go potty. JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE! kinda erases all the social, economic, racial, whatever kind of lines there are. poop and pee can do that like nothing else can, i guess.
glad i got that all cleared up. thanks A LOT bridge. i had set this personal goal to not use "poop" or "pee" in my next 17 posts. and i didn't even make it through ONE.
eloquently composed by jess at 10:27 PM
1 Comments:
Jess, I freakin love you. You make me laugh like none other. Keep up the blog everyone! It is hilarious.
Side note: It is actually the healthiest people who can clog a toilet. Pooping like that is one a dream for some....
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