my two cents
i'm branching out. it's always been my goal to blog about more serious topics. bridge and i have discussed starting our own blogs to do our own thing on. eventually, we'll do that. but for now, this is my venue, shared or not.
my co-authors may or may not share my point of view. that's the standard disclaimer.
the topic i've picked for today is sex education.
sex education is paramount for kids. parents claim to discuss it with their children, but do they really? for a variety of reasons, including personal, religious, moral and other beliefs, i understand why it's such a hot topic. all of these aside, it's important to really teach our kids all about sex. and i don't just mean the consequences. let's take the taboo out of it. things that are no longer taboo are all of a sudden much less interesting.
every state in the nation has passed laws regarding sex education. some of the new programs appear to be working. everyone seems to get hung up on promoting abstinence versus the use of condoms.
abstinence is obviously the best choice. however, do you remember being a teenager?? hello!!
i think abstinence is best taught by removing the mystery from sex. be frank about it with your kids. they are curious about sex. give them answers. try not to be embarrassed about it. this part is critical. they need to know the consequences of their potential actions.
pregnancy should be, by far, the least of your worries with regards to consequences. kids last forever, but at least they move out (hopefully) in 18 years. herpes are forever. so are warts. so is hiv. oops!! all the others can lead to embarrassing leakage of pus from parts we can barely name with their real names to our kids. of course, it's easily cleared up with antibiotics, but still. ewwwwwwwwwwwww. nothing says "i love you" like a prescription for valtrex, right? wrong-o.
should the schools be teaching sex ed in high school? i say no. that's far too late. obviously, i am not talking about the venue, i am talking about the timing. i've already discussed sex with my kids, who are 6 and 8. it was the very basic conversation, but the door is open. it'll be easier the next time around. for me, at least. also, we talked about it in the car. i didn't have to look them in the eye while we were discussing it. sex should be discussed early and often. not once a week or anything, but not just once.
birth control should also be part of the conversation. even if 95 percent of our kids choose abstinence, do you want your kid to fall into the 5 percent who did not? do you want your daughter or son to be faced with the adoption decision? teens need to know there are ways to be smart once they have made what is arguably a regrettable decision. i strongly advise all sexually active people of any age who are in an non-committed relationship to use condoms. and don't give me the argument that they can break, they may not protect 100 percent, etc. they are better than nothing at all.
parents are busier than ever these days...just like all americans. it's important we take time as parents to teach our children about sex, abstinence, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, and protection methods at an early age. it's important to de-mystify sex. it's my belief that by giving our children the gift of knowledge, they'll make a smarter decision.
i'll, uh, give you an update in about 10 years. by then, i should know if my advice is good or not. ;0) thanks for reading...
my co-authors may or may not share my point of view. that's the standard disclaimer.
the topic i've picked for today is sex education.
sex education is paramount for kids. parents claim to discuss it with their children, but do they really? for a variety of reasons, including personal, religious, moral and other beliefs, i understand why it's such a hot topic. all of these aside, it's important to really teach our kids all about sex. and i don't just mean the consequences. let's take the taboo out of it. things that are no longer taboo are all of a sudden much less interesting.
every state in the nation has passed laws regarding sex education. some of the new programs appear to be working. everyone seems to get hung up on promoting abstinence versus the use of condoms.
abstinence is obviously the best choice. however, do you remember being a teenager?? hello!!
i think abstinence is best taught by removing the mystery from sex. be frank about it with your kids. they are curious about sex. give them answers. try not to be embarrassed about it. this part is critical. they need to know the consequences of their potential actions.
pregnancy should be, by far, the least of your worries with regards to consequences. kids last forever, but at least they move out (hopefully) in 18 years. herpes are forever. so are warts. so is hiv. oops!! all the others can lead to embarrassing leakage of pus from parts we can barely name with their real names to our kids. of course, it's easily cleared up with antibiotics, but still. ewwwwwwwwwwwww. nothing says "i love you" like a prescription for valtrex, right? wrong-o.
should the schools be teaching sex ed in high school? i say no. that's far too late. obviously, i am not talking about the venue, i am talking about the timing. i've already discussed sex with my kids, who are 6 and 8. it was the very basic conversation, but the door is open. it'll be easier the next time around. for me, at least. also, we talked about it in the car. i didn't have to look them in the eye while we were discussing it. sex should be discussed early and often. not once a week or anything, but not just once.
birth control should also be part of the conversation. even if 95 percent of our kids choose abstinence, do you want your kid to fall into the 5 percent who did not? do you want your daughter or son to be faced with the adoption decision? teens need to know there are ways to be smart once they have made what is arguably a regrettable decision. i strongly advise all sexually active people of any age who are in an non-committed relationship to use condoms. and don't give me the argument that they can break, they may not protect 100 percent, etc. they are better than nothing at all.
parents are busier than ever these days...just like all americans. it's important we take time as parents to teach our children about sex, abstinence, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy, and protection methods at an early age. it's important to de-mystify sex. it's my belief that by giving our children the gift of knowledge, they'll make a smarter decision.
i'll, uh, give you an update in about 10 years. by then, i should know if my advice is good or not. ;0) thanks for reading...
Labels: jess, my two cents
eloquently composed by jess at 8:56 PM
7 Comments:
I wholly agree... it blows my mind how many parents try to shield their children from the topic of sex. It's a natural part of life. Why do we deny that? Because we've been taught to be embarrassed of it?
While we're on the subject, why is it we regulate sex and nudity on TV, but not violence? Someone gets shot on TV in every other show and no one says a word. But let someone flash a little skin and the world comes to an end.
Isn't that backwards? I mean, at least sex is a natural and (hopefully) beautiful part of life.
thanks, eagle. great insight.
i was thinking about this even more during my morning commute.
we teach our kids to exercise and eat well...because it's part of a healthy life. but we ignore that sex is normal, healthy...and fun! it's a critical part of any intimate relationship. just ask any people who aren't getting any... :)
anyway. by letting our kids know that it's normal...and beautiful with the right person, it may steer them towards waiting.
I whole heartedly agree with your attitude about sex education and think it's so important to talk to kids openly about sex.
My mom first talked to my sister and I about sex when I was 7 or 8. It was age appropriate and within the context of our religious beliefs. As I got older we continued to talk very frankly about sex and I was never told it was sinful or bad a thing. Mom provided us with great context for the whole thing
She was very open about the subject and it was great to be able to go to her with questions as I began dating and I feel like I've got a healthy attitude towards sex now.
RIGHT ON!!!
you go girl. good on you! i have much respect for you and love you mucho, mucho.
you have some some lucky kids.
I totally agree with you. Absolutely.
Gawd - I remember Nana and Poppy making me sit down and read this horrific cartoon book that involved a sperm wearing a top hat. They WATCHED me read the book. It had people having cartoon sex. The bad thing was, my sister and I had found the book beforehand and LAUGHED AND LAUGHED about it. Not so funny when your parents are eagerly watching and waiting for your questions. That goes down as one of the most humiliating days in my life.
Did it help me later in life as far as NOT having sex? No. Was I smart enough to not get knocked up before I was married. Well, no - but at least I waited until I was in my 30's!!! BWAHAHAHAA!!! And actually, that's a different scenario altogether.
Once again - I post too much in your comments.
You go.
WHERE IN THE HELL IS THIS SPIDER POST???
I think I would have run SCREAMING OUT OF THE ROOM if my parents had EVER TALKED TO ME ABOUT SEX!
AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!
You would have to know my parents to understand, but there it is.
I agree with everything on here. As long as they teach abstinence as well, I think that they should know all the risks, precautions, etc.
That is different than handing out condoms at school, though. I think more than the education, that is what a lot of parents seem to flare up about around the country.
Jess,
This is a difficult topic. In a perfect world parents would take resopnsibility for offering comprehensive sex eds to their kids. But either out of neglect or fear (or both) some don't and leave their kids and society exposed (pardon the pun) to the consequences of sexual ignorance.
As a result we have sex ed in the schools which limits the autonomy of the parents who do teach their kids. The inaction of one group causes limitations for the other.
Difficult for certain.
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